Toddlers are cute, adorable, lovely, cheeky...but they can also be mischievous, tiring, naughty...they're basically not always a delight, right? So why would any mother in her right mind think about having another child...a newborn...another human while she's got a toddler? Well, plenty of reasons actually! But before we get into that let's first address some issues you would have if you were to get pregnant while having a toddler.
First of all and probably the biggest issue is energy.
Will you have the energy to run around a naked 2-year old that's holding his nappy upside down and you praying that nothing falls out?
Well, for the first trimester you probably won't. But by now you have probably realised that a woman's body; a mother's body has an amazing ability to still be able to function on little to no sleep right? And that you're still able to care for your toddler when you're ill and you need caring for yourself. And you know why that is? Because we are naturally built to be nurturing and we grow stronger and more capable every day. I wouldn't worry too much about that especially if you take time for yourself during the day too. Try and use the time your toddler naps to sleep too, studies suggest even a 20-minute nap can be enough to re-energise a person.
Will you have the energy to run around a naked 2-year old that's holding his nappy upside down and you praying that nothing falls out?
Well, for the first trimester you probably won't. But by now you have probably realised that a woman's body; a mother's body has an amazing ability to still be able to function on little to no sleep right? And that you're still able to care for your toddler when you're ill and you need caring for yourself. And you know why that is? Because we are naturally built to be nurturing and we grow stronger and more capable every day. I wouldn't worry too much about that especially if you take time for yourself during the day too. Try and use the time your toddler naps to sleep too, studies suggest even a 20-minute nap can be enough to re-energise a person.
Will my child be jealous? Am I being selfish in wanting another child?
Yes, your child will get jealous. Will your child hate you? Certainly not. Will your child hate the baby? Well, that depends on your approach before the baby is born. A lot of mothers think the work begins after the baby is born but you have to mentally prepare your toddler for the arrival of this 'invader' in their eyes. You have to reassure them that although there'll be someone new in the family that you still love them and nothing will change. You must remember that your toddler might not want to share you or daddy with this 'crying ball of cuteness' and you must address this while the baby is still cosy inside. Buy some 'New sister/brother' books and read them to your child.
Yes, your child will get jealous. Will your child hate you? Certainly not. Will your child hate the baby? Well, that depends on your approach before the baby is born. A lot of mothers think the work begins after the baby is born but you have to mentally prepare your toddler for the arrival of this 'invader' in their eyes. You have to reassure them that although there'll be someone new in the family that you still love them and nothing will change. You must remember that your toddler might not want to share you or daddy with this 'crying ball of cuteness' and you must address this while the baby is still cosy inside. Buy some 'New sister/brother' books and read them to your child.
Trust me I know how you're feeling. I had the same concerns (I still do) but it's possible and you can do it.
You are not being selfish. Your child will appreciate their sibling in the years to come and you will forever be thankful that you took this step and created an unbreakable bond between your kids.
Get your toddler involved! Let him pick out the tiny outfit for his baby sister, let him choose the cuddly toy she'll have in her cot, little things here and there help boost his confidence and reassures him that (i) you still need him and (ii) you trust him and his choices.
Another thing to remember is to try and enjoy as much quality time with your toddler as you can, build beautiful memories and relish these moments, no matter how small they may be,
You are not being selfish. Your child will appreciate their sibling in the years to come and you will forever be thankful that you took this step and created an unbreakable bond between your kids.
Get your toddler involved! Let him pick out the tiny outfit for his baby sister, let him choose the cuddly toy she'll have in her cot, little things here and there help boost his confidence and reassures him that (i) you still need him and (ii) you trust him and his choices.
Another thing to remember is to try and enjoy as much quality time with your toddler as you can, build beautiful memories and relish these moments, no matter how small they may be,
because it won't just be the two of you anymore.
However, don't create any new routines or make too many trips to the park; you won't have time to do that when the baby is born so you don't want him sensing that he's missing out later.
How can I help my toddler adjust better later?
It starts from now! Let daddy put him to sleep every couple of nights instead, gradually do less for your child yourself and let others or himself cater to his needs, that way he will slowly adjust to the idea that mummy won't always be available to help me.
There are probably plenty more worries on your mind but always remember the positives.
Your toddler will have someone to grow up with, be naughty and mischievous with, share secrets and lie to you to protect.
You've already had a child. Raising another one when you've had a good 2 or 3 years of experience is a lot easier. You'll see how naturally it'll come to you when the baby arrives and you'll laugh your worries off.
Your toddler will have someone to grow up with, be naughty and mischievous with, share secrets and lie to you to protect.
You've already had a child. Raising another one when you've had a good 2 or 3 years of experience is a lot easier. You'll see how naturally it'll come to you when the baby arrives and you'll laugh your worries off.
Good luck momma.
Comment below! Do you have a toddler and a baby? How did it work for you?
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